Three special days, for spn_summergen

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Title: Three special days
Recipient: spn_summergen
Rating: T
Word Count: 1600
Warnings: none
Summary: Three birthdays from Sam's childhood.



One

Sam - naturally - didn't remember his first birthday but sometimes it felt like he did because he imagined it so many times.

He had a single photo of it that was made by their father and sometimes - very rarely - when John was in a self-flagellating mood, or when Dean was in a cheerful one, he heard stories about it.

He knew, of course, that his first birthday was only six months after the fire. He knew that Dad must have been still devastated and that he had just started to learn about the supernatural at that point. He also knew that Dean must have been quite traumatized. (He didn't realize it in their childhood because Dean was his strong and brave big brother but honestly Dean had been a quiet and withdrawn child until his early teens when he took up the bad-boy persona like an armor and hasn't shed it since.)

Neither Dad nor Dean said it in so many words but it was clear that John forgot Sam's birthday and it was Dean - five years old, himself - who organized the small party.

The birthday cake was a cupcake with a candle. Dean said once that he got that from the kitchen-lady at the kindergarten. From what Sam found out that must have been the first time Dean talked to anyone outside Sam or Dad in six months.

His present was a drawing of their family in which Mom was also there, and their old house. Sam had that picture for years until it got lost somewhere.

There were guests too. The two sock-puppets, named Dippy and Sippy. Sam remembered them quite well because they were around for quite some time until they got so full of holes that they got replaced by some toy soldiers Dean has found somewhere.

In the photo Sam was sitting in Dean's lap and they were both leaning forward to blow out the candle on the cupcake. The two puppets were sitting on books "watching".

The picture was obviously taken by John. Sam took a look at that picture on all his birthdays and thought maybe that was the happiest birthday he has ever had.

***

Fifteen

Spending his birthday in a hospital bed was not something Sam found particularly amusing. For once, they've spent almost a whole school-year in the same town and Sam actually had friends there. They planned to go out on his birthday, watch a movie, have pizza, something normal.

Brian, Nigel and Max were all a strange combination of popular guy and geek, who have been friends from early childhood and Sam fit in with them from first day. They were all on the school's soccer team where Sam tried out too and where he was also accepted. The three boys took him under their wing, so to say and Sam integrated into the small circle of friends shamelessly.

So, he had plans and he was looking forward to his birthday. But of course, Dad found a hunt just two days before Sam's birthday and of course, it went wrong. All three of them were banged up by the three werewolves. Because of course what Dad thought to be a werewolf were actually a pack of three.

And so it came that Sam's left leg was in a knee high cast after a minor surgery to set the bone and he was dozing on some heavy painkillers. But the worst thing was that Dean - always playing the mother hen, as if Sam couldn't take care of himself - was in ICU with some kind of head trauma of which Sam was not informed, naturally. He was just a stupid teenager, after all.

So, Sam was angrily dozing if such thing was possible. He would have spent the day like that if there weren't for the sudden commotion in front of his door. Then Nigel burst into the room.

"Sam!" he cried enthusiastically, then turned back towards the door and shouted outside. "I found him!"

Sam's two other friends rushed inside, too. All three of them were carrying fully packed backpacks and for a second Sam thought that the pain meds made him to hallucinate.

"What are you doing here?" he mumbled.

"We heard that you were mangled by a bear. Mom said that your dad called that you were in hospital."

"But we are in Minnesota..."

They were two states from school...

"And I wasn't mangled. My brother pushed out of the way" Sam said, still feeling like he was dreaming.

"Really?" Nigel stared at him. "I thought Mom was making fun of me. There really was a bear?"

Nigel's Mom was a teacher and obviously Dad made an effort to call the school and explain why Sam failed to show up on Monday.

"No, there wasn't a bear."

Nigel's face fell.

"There were three" Sam finished.

"You are just shitting us, now" Max declared.

"No, I'm really not. It was the most unfortunate camping" Sam said.

"That's hard man" Brian commented, always the most serious one in the group. "How is your family?"

"Dad's fine. He's badly bruised but he wasn't even kept here. Dean..." to his horror his voice sounded like he was on the edge of crying.

Nigel sat down on the bed and put his hand on Sam's shoulder. It somehow helped.

"What happened?" Max asked.

"One of the ... bears hit Dean on the head. It attacked me, but the stupid jerk pushed me out of the way and took the hit. He's still unconscious but they wouldn't tell me anything, Dad disappeared on me and they wouldn't let me see him."
It all came out in one long breath and all his friends looked at him with sympathy. Sam sighed deeply and forced out a smile.

"But really, what are you doing here and how did you get here?"

"We came by bus" Nigel said.

"And we came because it's your birthday" Max continued. "And we also brought presents."

The day after that was spent with Max's video game, with the comics Sam got as presents and the quite enormous pack of cookies, Brian's grandmother baked for them. Every time Sam got melancholic or nervous, one of the boys brought up a new topic and Sam's birthday wasn't that bad after all.

Their afternoon was stopped by John's arrival.

"Hello, Mr. Winchester!" the boys greeted in a chorus.

John nodded. He had an empty wheelchair with him.

"Nigel, your mother called and asked me to take you to the bus station. We are leaving in thirty but before that I need to talk to Sam for a second."

The three boys packed up quickly and they said their goodbyes. Sam of course knew that they were kind of intimidated by his father.

"Come on, Sam" he said when the teenagers were out of the room. "I wouldn't want you to spend your birthday without your brother."

Sam cheered up again.

"I can see him? Is he awake?"

"He woke up for a few moments. But he's asleep again. When I told the nursed it was your birthday, they agreed that you could sit with him" John explained, while he helped Sam into the wheelchair and started to push it out of the room.
Sam smiled contentedly.

"Happy birthday, son."

***


Seventeen

"Hey, Sammy!" Dean dropped down on the couch next to Sam disrupting his brooding.

"It's Sam. I'm not a baby anymore."

"I know."

Dean's voice was uncharacteristically serious and it made Sam look at him at last.
Dean had a package in his hands.

"What's that?"

"Did you think I would forget your birthday?" Dean asked with a grin but Sam saw quite worriedly that it was a false one. Dean gave his fake smiles to everyone except Sam. Never Sam.

Sam felt a bit guilty because that was exactly what he thought. That's why he was brooding on the couch in the first place. Lately, he has felt even more alone in his family than he used to. Dean had two jobs and he went out hunting with dad every weekend. They've barely talked anymore.

So most of the time he really felt like everyone has forgotten about him.

But of course that was a bit unfair. Dean has never forgotten his birthday before.

"What's wrong?" he asked instead of commenting on that.

"Why would anything be wrong?" Dean almost sounded as he meant it.

"I dunno. You look like..."

"The best brother in the world?"

Dean pulled two tickets from his inner pocket.

"Happy birthday, Sammy."

"Theater tickets?" Sam smiled earnestly. "That's really great! Thank you! Are you coming with me?"

"I thought you could ask that Sandra girl for a date."

"Yeah, maybe" Sam said, still smiling.

"And I got something else, too."

Dean gave over the package. It was perfectly gift wrapped so Sam guessed it wasn't Dean who did it. He opened the package very carefully.

There was a book in it.

'On to College: What high school students and their families need to know about college selection, application and admissions.'

"But how...?"

Sam never spoke about wanting to go to college.

"I know you, Sammy. No matter what you think, I'm not totally ignorant."

"I know that Dean."

"If you want to do this then do it right. If I can help you with anything tell me."

"But we can't tell Dad."

Dean closed his eyes for a second and when he opened them, he looked so much older than his actual years that it was frightening.

"He will find out sooner or later."

"Yeah, but the later the better. Please, Dean, promise me that you won't tell him."
Dean frowned but then smiled. Not the false smile but a hauntingly sad one.

"I promise But just because it's your birthday."